Saturday, September 17, 2011

worst running blogger EVER.

Has it really been since JUNE? Wow.

In June is when I started my Portland Marathon Training...coincidence? hmmm.
Training has gone well. Good even. Selene and I ran our final long run today, and I'll be honest. I was DREADING it.  I have dreaded the last few long ones, actually. I've told a few of my running friends...I was "over it". That I didn't even WANT to do it anymore. But, my loyalty to my friend kept me going. I knew I couldn't bail on my "teammate". Even though we're a team of 2. :) After our 19 miler, I wanted to cry...I told her, I never EVER wanted to run more than 19.

I started my period this week, which really didn't help my bad attitude. Staring a 20 miler in the face, feeling like poop. I just didn't want to do it. A friend of mine, and 6 time butt kicking marathoner, Megan, asked me how I was feeling about the 20 miler. I was honest. I was Debbie Downer. I was ridiculously pathetic. I don't wanna do it.

She totally encouraged me, and told me this is how I SHOULD be feeling at my peak week. It's my body telling me it's time to taper. I'm SO READY to taper!!! I have a feeling she shared my desperate need for encouragement with a few of my friends who are runners, becuase that day, and since, my inbox and phone has been full of encouraging and loving words from my sweet gal pals, telling me the hard part is done today. The race is worth it. That they were praying for me, believing in me, cheering for me. It TOTALLY sucked me up out of the pity party and yanked my bad attitude out of the crapper.

Selene and I set out today for our last long run. 20 miles. First, we missed our exit and drove about an extra 20 minutes in the wrong direction. Then, it started to rain. But, our first 10 miles were dry. Selene was SO smart to plan out our run in 2 ten mile chunks. It really helped my mental game. Just two easy 10 mile runs. we ran 5 miles one way and back to our car. Mini break. 5 miles in the other direction and back to the car for cool down. I truly felt happy clear until the end of our run. I have hit "the wall" now during our last 3 long runs. About 2-3 miles from the end. I get hit with goosebumps, feeling a bit dizzy, and mentally tapped. Then, it passes, and I am able to finish. This time, no wall! I kept thinking about the kind words of my friends, encouraging me to finish strong, that they believed in me and were proud of me. It totally filled me up. I ENJOYED 20 miles today. My best long run (over 15). I really wanted to try my running skirt one more time, to see if I could resolve my chafing issue. It is truly my FAVORITE thing to run in...Lululemon skirts are SO comfy. The last time I wore it on my 15 miler, I totally chaffed my thighs. Which had NEVER happened to me before...but this time I greased myself up really good with BodyGlide and had no problems.

I am feeling strong. Ready to taper. Ready for the Marathon. I was seriously dreading the marathon. Even, honestly, wishing for an injury to get me out of it. (there, I said it). But now, I feel ready. Excited even. I still think this is my last marathon for this season of my life. Maybe I'll do one again someday...but for now, I'm ready to spend my saturdays with my family...not on the pavement.

I"m wishing I hadn't been in such a funk these past few weeks. I've stopped logging my miles, and I wish I'd kept it up faithfully. I'm sure I can go back and figure it out...and I may. It's nice to see the miles logged and really feel the accomplishment of those minutes, hours, miles invested in this journey.

Tomorrow, I'm walking the Race for the Cure in Portland. I'm reminiscing that last year, this was my very first "race" that I ran. 5k...27:33. I felt AWESOME. I never thought I'd be a runner, much less EVER consider a marathon. I am. 3 half marathons later and on the brink of a full. Who knew...

Now the fun part...planning my outfit for the Marathon! :)


Jill - Striving to Stay the Course said...

Eryn, I totally know how you feel and felt! I was almost 'wishing' for an injury, too (never told that to anyone, either!), but thank God I didn't get injured b/c HE knew... and I knew, I could do it. I just had to put in all of those long, solo miles.
I will be there, cheering for you!! I am SO excited to be there on your day... the day you prove to yourself (and others) how dang mentally and physically strong you are! You will have bragging rights for sure!! Just picture the finish line!!! Can't wait!!! You've trained for it... and my favorite: You've. Freaking. Got. This. !!!!

ashleys said...

How fun friend to be doing the race for the cure today - your first race last year & you are ALREADY at the end of your training for your 1st Marathon!! You are amazing - so proud of you!!!